Review: The Cabin in the Woods

Posted: 09/18/2012 in Reviews
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First things first – if you LOVE horror movies, and savor every single “OH SH!T!” moment, DON’T EVEN WATCH THIS TRAILER!!!

Ok, here’s my take on “The Cabin in the Woods:” This movie was friggin’  AWESOME! Seriously, I haven’t seen a horror movie that I enjoyed this much in YEARS, and that’s saying something.  I had nearly given up on the genre, since the most enjoyable horror I’d seen in the last ten years or so were all horror/comedies, like “Jason X” and “Freddie vs. Jason,” movies that twisted the standard ‘young folks get chopped up during their morally-questionable activities’ meme and added surprises of both the comedic and horrific type.

This one takes that ‘horror and comedy’ combination and jacks up the twists, the stakes, and the FEEL of the whole movie to the ceiling.  Five friends, made up of one couple, two ‘single’ attractive friends, and a stoner that has known three of the others most of his life, are going up to the woods to visit a cabin near a lovely lake, one that Curt’s cousin has purchased.  Nothing new in THAT bit for seasoned horror fans, but the twists actually START before Curt and crew are even on the screen, with two ‘white collar’ guys reporting to work in some big, half-lab half-industrial plant location, talking about some vague ‘score,’ telling one of the other characters that ‘Japan has a perfect score, we’re number two, but we try harder!’

And at that point, other than saying “WATCH THIS MOVIE!!!” I’m going to stop giving any of the story up: You now know 3 minutes right at the beginning, and that’s it.  Everyone involved in this film did an excellent job, even things that would make viewers say “Oh, come ON, what?” are clearly intended to be exactly that, moments that leverage the cliche to the film’s advantage.   The cinematography, writing, acting, timing, everything works.  I love watching movies, normally, I can do a countdown to an ‘event,’ but the team behind this film seems to have gone over the film and left, oh, one out of three or four of those moments in intentionally, while creating the other moments in such a way that I even jumped a few times, sometimes in shock, sometimes laughing so hard I thought I would hurt myself.

The Cabin in the Woods

Click to go to Total Film’s website

Director – Drew Goddard   Writers – Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard

Chris Hemsworth plays the ‘jock’ character, Curt – not the standard ‘me Alpha jock, me do crude jokes…’ jock, but one on an academic scholarship for sociology.

Anna Hutchison plays his girlfriend, Jules Louden – who portrays the ‘popular girl with loose morals,’ except her best friend says ‘I’ve seen her drunk, this isn’t like her!’

Kristen Connolly portrays Dana Polk – a ‘nerdy’ girl who wants to take books to the weekend retreat, but of course, this ‘nerdy’ girl is a smokin’ hot readhead who had a bit of an affair… with one of her professors.

Fran Kranz plays Marty Mikalski – a stoner with a collapsible stainless-steel bong who has smoked SO MUCH weed he’s apparently immune to everything else.

Jesse Williams plays Holden McCrea – a scholar and an actual gentleman, this trip is supposed to be a match-up orchestrated between Curt and Jules to get Dana and Holden together.

This is available on Blu-Ray, DVD and on-demand as of today. And I’m more than happy to have paid my $5.99 to watch this, I just wish I’d seen this one in the theater.

Oh, and the cabin doesn’t spin. Not even once. Also, there are MANY worthy people in the cast other than these five, I just don’t want to spoil anything, MU HU HA HA HA!

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